Everyone has had to say 'goodbye' at some point in their life or another and my point is approaching soon because I'm headed off to college. I'm not going to say 'goodbye' though because I know at one-point-or-another, there's a high chance that I'll see my friends that I have right now. Whether it's at their honeymoon, at a restaurant, or in their shower - just kidding - I'll make it happen if I really want to see them. So for right now, I'll just say "see ya' later".

But being absolutely realistic and down to Earth, there's a chance that we may fall out or even forget each other - hopefully not - so I know there's going to be, as my friend Jahan calls it, a 'fuckton' of regret if I don't say what I want to tell them now. Regret is an awful feeling, you must know: that permanent thorn in your face.

Half of them might be offended because I was such a people pleaser. Half of them much be scared by my strange words and flee the country to avoid me. Half of them may blush or shove me away. Half will realize that this is incorrect math.

Most of the things I want to say can be said easily. But then there's always one or two speeches that I just can't say because I can't seem to get it out. Even as I daydream about it or rehearse it in front of a mirror whilst stranded, alone, in an office, I can't get past "you.....". The worst thing is that what I have to say to those people are the most important and on top of my priority-list-of-stuff-to-say.

They're the ones..... that........

What should I do?

To my absolute horror this morning, I got a text from one of my friends that I was Skyping, which read something along the lines of "You're going to regret shit [today]." And then it dawned on me; when the late hours approach but I'm forcing myself to stay up, there's this tendency to get a little.... 'loose' per se. While I remember bits and pieces of the night, such as me screaming "Ryan Reynolds has nice boobs" and "you're fucking beautiful" to someone which really didn't need to hear that (at least not from me, of all people), I apparently also 'awkwardly flirted' - according to the friend that texted me - with the other person in the conversation. This included, but is not limited to, me declaring that people should back off him and that he had a 'sexy' body.

I over-reacted a bit at first because the colour drained from my face like the Titanic just sunk again or something. It's not that I really meant those things. Well, I did. But not in a flirty way; in like a friend-kidding way. I would totally not be freaking out if I didn't think he'd take it the wrong way and avoid me as of I were the Black Plague of Summer 2011. Why can't my sarcasm hit people in the face like a freight train? And I don't mean that literally. Sometimes.

Definition: That friend you turn to whenever all of your other main friends are gone, asleep, or have dropped off the face of the electronic world.

I had actually written out a whole story leading up to why I was going to talk about 'second hand' friends, but then I realized that rather than be passive aggressive, I'll face-to-face confront him about it one day. Wait- What? A face to face conversation? In the twenty first century?!? WHAT IS THIS MADNESS? In all seriousness, this needs to be addressed generally because it's been an on-going issue.

Living in the digital age, it's absolutely hard to realize sometimes that quality dominates over quantity, especially in the area of friendships. Just look at all of those friend whores on Facebook with 2,468 friends; I cannot speak for all of them, but from where I live, it's become a priority to gather friends like some sort of sheep game rather than strengthen existing relationships.

That's why, I propose a radical change to the world. Wait for it.... wait for it. Let's. Be. HONEST. WOAH. WOAH. GROUNDBREAKING. EARTH SHATTERING. HOLY COW.

Because people nowadays opt to either keep shut or to put on a poker face in front of everyone, even that irritating bimbo they hate, this phenomenon of 'second hand' friendship happens way too often. Not only is this absolutely rude, especially if you become the second friend, but it just elongates a process of push-pull mental absenteeism in conversations.